Confessions from Householdsix » fibromyalgia

Fibromyalgia Awareness Day

Amanda — Wed, 12 May 2010 10:43:52 +0000

Today is Fibromyalgia Awareness Day. If you’d like to see if there’s a local event near you, please visit the list of events from the National Fibromyalgia Association site. Locally, the Appleebee’s in Chambersburg, PA is offering 15% of your bill to the National Fibromyalgia Association all day.

Sleeping Like a Baby

Amanda — Fri, 19 Feb 2010 12:20:36 +0000

How often have you used the phrase “I slept like a baby?” I have, but not in the traditional sense. I slept like a baby last night. It seems a cold has settled into my nose making it run like a sieve. No big deal really. Nothing some Sudafed can’t help. The only bad thing is the sleeping like a baby part. I only sleep three to four hours at a stretch before I wake up unable to quiet my brain and fall back asleep quickly. Those of you who read here with fibromyalgia know this is really going to suck in a couple days when this sleep pattern catches up to me.

Melancholy

Amanda — Sun, 28 Jun 2009 11:32:00 +0000

Melancholy is the only way I can describe my mood in June. I’m sure it’s been reflected in my blog and by my heavier than usual posts. June is a busy month for me emotionally. It all starts in May when I start thinking about how June comes after May and what that means to me and my emotional well being. June 7th was my grandpa’s birthday. Grandpa would’ve been 86 this year. Wow that’s pretty old when I sit to figure it out. Due to my mother’s craziness, Grandpa was the father figure in my life while I was growing up. I was Grandpa’s Girl, his partner in crime. It’s been 8 years since he died and I still miss out crack of dawn breakfasts out and sitting by the pond fishing. Grandpa died June 22, 2001.

Zach was born June 24, 2001. You see my dilemma? And my pregnancy and Zach’s birth weren’t all a walk in the emotional park. I don’t have it in me today to type it all out again, but you can read Zach’s birth story if you like. My pregnancy with Zach was also when I realized something was wrong with my body. I was SO tired and SO achy ALL the time. My doctor told me it was just part of being pregnant, but I just knew what I was experiencing was more extreme than what most women go through. I just had that hunch that something wasn’t right. I got to say “I told you so,” when I got my fibromyalgia diagnosis 4 months after Zach was born. It seems my OB wanted to conveniently ignore the fact that for about 2 months before I got pregnant I was sleeping 12-14 hours a day, and any less sleep left me feeling like I had never slept at all.

Now that Zach’s older, we have his oppositional defiant disorder to deal with. I’m still not convinced that’s the correct or total diagnosis, but that’s the one the doctors seem to want to stick with. June makes my anxiety flare up because it’s the end of his school year and I have him home 24/7. It’s very stressful when you have to put more time and energy into parenting your 8 year old than your 2 year old. I can’t even leave the room when they’re both awake to go load the dishwasher or throw a load of laundry in. Making meals is hugely stressful when I’m here by myself during the day with the boys. Aaron, my toddler will sit and play quietly with his toys for 5, 10, sometimes even 20 minutes. He has a couple of favorite tv shows that he’ll sit and watch while I go scrub the bathroom. Zach has NEVER been like this. He’s the child that I go pee and come back and he’s already gotten the Sharpie I had on the very tippy top shelf and written on the furniture or walls. Now that he has a brother, he’s taken to antagonizing him. I constantly have to watch him, and quite frankly, it gets exhausting.

And now since my sister got married in June, we have her anniversary to celebrate. It’s a date that I hope remains joyous for her for the rest of her life, and it’s a happy date to add to our calendar as well.

So you can see June is just an emotional month for me, and coupled with some of the events of this year, it’s left me feeling particularly vulnerable this time around.

Rock A Bye Mommy

Amanda — Wed, 06 May 2009 10:40:00 +0000

For the first time since I was diagnosed with fibromyalgia 7 years ago I was able to see a rheumatologist – yesterday. We came to the determination that yes, I do have fibromyalgia, and it’s probably mostly brought on by my lack of quality sleep. Quantity isn’t an issue. I need 10-12 hours a day to feel refreshed. If I go grocery shopping and run errands in the morning, I need a nap in the afternoon because I’m tired. Evidently I’m only supposed to be getting 7-8 hours of sleep. My cat like qualities aren’t normal. So, he suggested I get a sleep study done to find out why I’m not getting quality sleep. With a deviated septum and allergies it could be any host of reasons. I’ll have to call my primary care doc for the sleep study referral and go from there. It was nice to get a different take on things and to not have sleeping pills or antidepressants thrown at me though.

Piss Moan Groan Complain

Amanda — Fri, 02 Jan 2009 22:50:00 +0000

Yes, It’s only January 2nd, and I’m in a pissy mood. How else would you feel if you were a newly minted 29yo and you walk like you’re an 80yo with years of arthritis buildup? I’ve barely been able to move for the last week at least. My fibro’s been bad, but not this bad since right after I had Zach and I got sent to John’s Hopkins because they had no idea what was wrong with me. I had some lucidity through the fog while switching laundry loads and now I wonder if it isn’t the B complex vitamins my CNRP told me to take for my mood swings. If it is, are those my choices? Be in extreme pain or be a royal bitch all the time? I’ve tried medical drugs for the mood swings, but those turn me into Miss PMS of the Universe. Think husband’s breathing literally makes me stomp off to the bedroom before I rip off his head and spit down his neck. Yeah, THAT’S what the meds do to me.

I’ve looked for support groups in my area, but I can’t find any. There’s plenty for people with arthritis, but I don’t have arthritis. So now I’m in search of a good online group. A place to piss, moan, and commiserate, but not whine. There is a difference. Unfortunately I’ve found a lot of groups to be filled with whiners. Back to your regular scheduled blogging while I go pop more ibuprofen and curl up on the couch with my really soft fleece blanket that now feels like 100 grit sandpaper.